Chill Pill Chronicles

In my last blog, I talked about how my OCD deals with rumination.  So, today I want to get into what rumination is and how we can treat it.  Rumination is defined as this: "Rumination involves repetitive and passive thoughts focused on the cause and effects (triggers) of a person's distress.  However, these thoughts do not lead to the person engaging in active coping mechanisms that would relieve distress and improve mood".  A lot of times rumination can be confused with emotional processing.  While they both focus on problems and usually emotions surrounding these problems, rumination tends to focus on more negative thought patterns.  This can include thought patterns that involve cognitive distortions and focusing mainly on the negative aspects of a situation.  Emotional processing, by contrast, may start out this way, but leads to acceptance and release of negative emotions, while rumination keeps you stuck.  Rumination often leads to self-blam...

Today I want to dive into OCD.  Let's talk about what it is, symptoms of OCD, and some ways to heal from it. The National Institute of Mental Health defines OCD as this: "OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder) is a long-lasting disorder in which a person experiences uncontrollable and recurring thoughts (obsessions), engaging in repetitive behaviors (compulsions), or both".  People with OCD have time consuming symptoms that can cause significant distress and interfere with daily life. Let's break it down a little more.  Obsessions are defined as "repeated thoughts, urges, or mental images that are intrusive, unwanted, and make most people anxious".  Some common obsessions are: Fear of germs or contamination. Fear of forgetting, losing or misplacing something.  Aggressive thoughts toward others or oneself. Unwanted, forbidden, or taboo thoughts involving sex, religion, or harm.  The desire to have things symmetrical or in perfect order.  Compulsions are de...

 Ya'll, I have gone down a rabbit hole.  I first heard about attachment theory and attachment types on The Anxiety Chicks Podcast, and it really piqued my interest.  I started down a rabbit hole of research about attachment theory and ultimately how it affects adult relationships.  So, here we go.  Attachment Theory focuses on relationships and bonds between people, including those between child and parent and romantic partners.  It is a psychological explanation for the emotional bonds between people.  Attachment Theory suggest that people are born with the innate need to forge bonds with caregivers as children.  These early bonds may continue to have an influence on attachments throughout life.  I believe this is especially true if you experienced trauma of some type in childhood.  British psychologist John Bowlby was the first attachment theorist.  He described attachment as "a lasting psychological connectedness between human be...

Yes, that's a real thing.  Here's the Mayo Clinic's description of nocturnal panic attacks: "Nocturnal panic attacks can occur with no obvious trigger and awaken you from your sleep.  As with daytime panic attacks, you may experience sweating, rapid heart rate, trembling, hyperventilation, shortness of breath, flushing or chills, and a sense of impending doom."  Nocturnal panic attacks are most common when you are transitioning between light sleep and deep sleep.  These types of panic attacks are normally found in people with panic and anxiety disorders.   Nocturnal panic attacks are not the same as night terrors.  During nocturnal panic attacks, the person is clearly awake when the episode is happening.  During night terrors, the person stays in the sleep state, usually doesn't know what is happening, and often won't have recollection of it.   It's hard to really pinpoint causes of nocturnal panic attacks, but experts have listed geneti...

Hey everyone!  Sorry I have been a little MIA, I had some writers block.   Today I want to talk about BFRB’s (body focused repetitive behaviors). The ADAA list the most common BFRB’s as; “hair-pulling (Trichotillomania), skin picking (Excoriation), nail biting (Onychophagia), and cheek biting (Morsicatio Buccarum)”.  These behaviors can be dangerous and lead to serious scarring and/or infection.  BFRB’s are typically a comorbid diagnosis with OCD, but not always.  They can also be linked to other conditions.  It is important to speak to a medical professional if you experience any symptoms of BFRB’s. I personally have pretty bad Excoriation.  I have the uncontrollable urge (compulsion) to pick at my arms, face, and the skin around my fingernails.  I believe I pick at my skin at least once a day but usually more.  Sometimes I go through cycles where I will pick for the majority of the day, leaving me in a good deal of pain from how tender my s...

***TRIGGER WARNING: physical abuse & mention of drugs*** This post is going to be very vulnerable.  I am going to talk about some things that may be very triggering to some people.   If you are triggered by physical abuse or mention of drugs, please DO NOT continue reading this post.   I think we all remember our “first love”.  For most people, those memories tend to be positive, fun, happy memories.  That, unfortunately, is not the case for me. 16 year old Emily had A LOT of issues.  Not only was I still struggling with my anxiety and depression, I was starting to experience some things that I believe most 16 year old girls struggle with.  I was very self conscience.  I was very unsure of my self and my worth as a person.  So, what do most 16 year old girls do when they feel this way?  They look for a boy to give them that confidence boost.  I craved the attention that I received from boys.  They would tell me how pretty I...